Dear Ms. Bardsley,
I just read your blog titled "Romance Novels: Another Form of Porn?" in LDS Living Magazine. As a reader—and writer—of romance, I would like to offer a differing viewpoint.
Quoting from the Romance Writers of America genre description page, which I have copied and pasted from their website (http://www.rwa.org/cs/the_romance_genre) a romance novel is defined as having:
A Central Love Story: The main plot centers around two individuals falling in love and struggling to make the relationship work. A writer can include as many subplots as he/she wants as long as the love story is the main focus of the novel.
An Emotionally-Satisfying and Optimistic Ending: In a romance, the lovers who risk and struggle for each other and their relationship are rewarded with emotional justice and unconditional love.
Romance novels may have any tone or style, be set in any place or time, and have varying levels of sensuality—ranging from sweet to extremely hot. These settings and distinctions of plot create specific subgenres within romance fiction.
The romance genre is frequently and unfairly maligned. Are there those books you describe? Yes, definitely. But it seems to me your blog lumps anything that can be construed a romance into one big, evil pot. You imply that, specifically, romance novel escapist tendencies are bad, while the escapist tendencies of other novels in general are not. Are you telling me that horror, science fiction, fantasy, and mystery cannot potentially do the same things you are accusing romance of doing? In my opinion, your statements paint with too broad a brush.
You seem to think women's escapist choices in particular undermine individuals, relationships, and families. And yet, if you read the description of the genre from RWA once more, it would appear that the general intent of romance is the struggle, development, and ultimate success of the relationship. The RWA also requires an emotionally satisfying and optimistic ending. To me, that is what the Gospel is all about: developing a deep and loving relationship with my husband, and looking forward to eternity—the ultimate "happy ending."
That said, I also recognize that one must be careful selecting reading—romance or otherwise—from the national market. We each have our own sensibilities, and each romance author has her individual style and approach when it comes to the inclusion of intimacy and the level of sensuality. However, to clarify, sex scenes are not the primary content of most romances, as you state in your blog. And while there are authors I will not read, there are others whose writing I find to be sensitive, and who deal with intimacy in a context within the story that I feel is respectful.
Age and experience are definitely factors that need to be considered when choosing any reading materials. It is unfortunate that the 17-yr old you mentioned had a bad experience. Good for her for having good judgment. There have been books (of all types, not simply romance), movies, and TV shows my children have expressed an interest in reading or watching over the years, and I reviewed and censored them as I deemed appropriate. Trips to the library should not be an exception to this rule.
I am glad Deseret Book is developing a brand of "Proper Romance." Women are relationship driven. It would only make sense that novels dealing with these types of stories and themes would hold appeal for many women.
Sincerely and respectfully,
Karen Tuft
http://www.ldsliving.com/story/68147-ae-romance-novels-another-form-of-porn
Showing posts with label young women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label young women. Show all posts
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
. . . and Rhett Butler eyed Scarlett descending the staircase . . .
A few years back I was asked to teach a Relief Society lesson on the topic of self worth. One of the references on which I was to base the lesson was a talk by Jeffrey R. Holland, from October 2005 General Conference (url reference below). I was particularly struck by his plea to be accepting of ourselves physically, and not to obsess over the images we see in the media that create unrealistic expectations. How could I get the women who heard my lesson to see themselves differently and really appreciate themselves for who they are?
It got me thinking . . .
And then an idea struck . . .
Say what you will about romance novels (I've heard most of it already), but the genre exists for a reason. As Robert Frost once said, "Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." What would it be like if I could make the women feel like they were the heroine of a romance novel—and have someone gaze at them adoringly and wax poetic about them?
So that's exactly what I did. I wrote a line or two of romantic description about every single woman who would be there. I told the women to imagine they were the heroines of a romance, descending a grand staircase, and the hero was waiting at the bottom, really seeing them for the first time. The descriptions included references to queenly red locks that spoke of fire and passion, elfin features full of joy and mischief, the deep, soft eyes of a doe, and a "smile [that] carried the sweetness of hearth and home, with turquoise eyes that held the depths of the Caribbean within them." I tried to make them sound extra romantic.
I read each one and had the women guess who it was describing. I was surprised to discover how many of the specific descriptions I'd written applied to more than one woman!
The exercise was just supposed to be a simple object lesson, with the hope that the women would begin to see themselves differently. I was totally unprepared for the results. The reaction after class was extraordinary. I got lots of comments—most of them emotional reactions to what they'd heard about themselves and each other. Afterwards, one woman asked me if I'd noticed D (the SEVENTY-year-old with the soft eyes of a doe), when I'd said it was a description of her. "She sat up straight in her chair like she was a new woman for the rest of the lesson."
The woman with Caribbean eyes came up to me afterward, crying, because she'd never thought of herself like that before.
The other surprising result was that, to this day, I still look at D and am drawn to her beautiful brown doe eyes first. I see C and immediately think of the Caribbean. M will always be the mischievous elfin sprite to me (I found out later she's part Irish).
I hope their perspective of themselves changed that day and that they recognize the beauty found in their uniqueness. I know my perspective of them did.
http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2005/10/to-young-women?lang=eng&query=self+worth+women
It got me thinking . . .
And then an idea struck . . .
Say what you will about romance novels (I've heard most of it already), but the genre exists for a reason. As Robert Frost once said, "Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." What would it be like if I could make the women feel like they were the heroine of a romance novel—and have someone gaze at them adoringly and wax poetic about them?
So that's exactly what I did. I wrote a line or two of romantic description about every single woman who would be there. I told the women to imagine they were the heroines of a romance, descending a grand staircase, and the hero was waiting at the bottom, really seeing them for the first time. The descriptions included references to queenly red locks that spoke of fire and passion, elfin features full of joy and mischief, the deep, soft eyes of a doe, and a "smile [that] carried the sweetness of hearth and home, with turquoise eyes that held the depths of the Caribbean within them." I tried to make them sound extra romantic.
I read each one and had the women guess who it was describing. I was surprised to discover how many of the specific descriptions I'd written applied to more than one woman!
The exercise was just supposed to be a simple object lesson, with the hope that the women would begin to see themselves differently. I was totally unprepared for the results. The reaction after class was extraordinary. I got lots of comments—most of them emotional reactions to what they'd heard about themselves and each other. Afterwards, one woman asked me if I'd noticed D (the SEVENTY-year-old with the soft eyes of a doe), when I'd said it was a description of her. "She sat up straight in her chair like she was a new woman for the rest of the lesson."
The woman with Caribbean eyes came up to me afterward, crying, because she'd never thought of herself like that before.
The other surprising result was that, to this day, I still look at D and am drawn to her beautiful brown doe eyes first. I see C and immediately think of the Caribbean. M will always be the mischievous elfin sprite to me (I found out later she's part Irish).
I hope their perspective of themselves changed that day and that they recognize the beauty found in their uniqueness. I know my perspective of them did.
http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2005/10/to-young-women?lang=eng&query=self+worth+women
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